Learning to Go with Your Gut

Whew! What a week and it's only Wednesday. I'm not saying it in a bad way. It's just that today's my last day at my temp job and V and I move back to NC on Saturday. Yes its vastly different from DC but if I'm going to pursue my art and raise V the way I see fit I need to be in a smaller, slower, friendlier place.

Who am I kidding? I'm nervous as hell about this move. Wouldn't it be great to just see the future a teeny wheeny bit so I could know for sure, w/o a shadow of doubt that I was doing the right thing. This isnt just about moving to a new town. I'm committing to putting my dream first. That means taking a possibly less paying (and less stressful) job in a town with a much smaller commute so I can spend more time with Vincent and have more time to make art. Sounds like a good idea right?

You know what its really about even more than moving and art and mom-dom. Its about me biting the bullet, peeing or getting off the pot, taking the bull by the horns, and just doing IT. By It I mean making a commitment and decision to be loyal to my own heart's calling. And for the love of cheese and crackers to STOP worring about what They think about how I live my life, my choices and even what kind of art I make.

So in honor of Them I made a journal entry that sums up how I feel about it. And I love how different it is from the piece above that I made the same day. (I'm learning to love both sides of my coin) This felt so good to make. It was like me having a right to say just what I feel and not giving a you know what what anybody thinks. Speaking of which, I think is a major hinderance in my art and me coming into my authentic artist voice. So get ready b/c y'all might be seeing more of these from time to time. Sometimes you gotta plunge the toilet to get it to flush (ok that was even gross for me...)

Okay gotta get back to work. Thanks for listening SMOOCHES!

(And what do they know?)