...dog.
...hebrew slave.
I started work today and it was cool actually. (yes, im saying getting up way too early to do something mildly interesting and getting paid just above the poverty level can be cool, right? please say yes or I'm gonna eat a pack of raw fudge brownies right now.) It was a welcome break from being at home for the last almost three months. I'm here to tell you there is no job harder than being a full-time at home mom and I have a lil confession to make(shhh)...I miss day care. I mean I really miss it. I love my son and I shouldn't feel bad for saying this BUT I need some time to myself. And not to go hang out or do anything special (but what would be wrong with that?) I just want some time when I'm not cooking, cleaning or trying to squeeze my big ass down kiddee slide (imagine a watermelon trying to make it through a straw).
For those of you who don't know I take care of V by myself. His father has never been in the picture (a whole other blog all together. remember, pot and oral sex do not go together not at all.) Anyway, this job is harder than I could ever imagine. But the good news is now that I'm working my little man will be back with his snotee nosed cohorts. and since I get off at 2:30 and noon on Friday I will get a little meeee time. Yippee!
On to art...I've got some stuff but don't feel like getting off my butt to hook up my camera to show y'all. Plus they're not finished. And I'm getting tired of pattng myself on the back for starting and not finishing a project. I did buyt some alphabet stamps this weekend but now am scared to commit to adding any writing. It's always something. I'm so scared of effin' em up that now they're starting to collect dust. Which is in total oppposition to this idea of selling my art so I don't have to go to that job up there. I can't sell it cus it's not finished. And its not finishd cus I don't wanna mess it up. Sounds like BS to me too. So I've got to make some decisions this week and ad some things to my Etsy shop by next week. The things I have on there now are just sitting and I don't really even reflect my current style. go figure. Well anyway, I'm off to wash the day off and finish off a bottle of vino. smooches!
So cool! You made me smile. I now is not easy. Take that time for you and Enjoy it!! Maybe you are needing a lot more time by yourself. Keep trying and keep believing in you and you will find your way...in art...and in Life!
ReplyDeleteEnjoy that time for yourself, even if your are working.
ReplyDeleteDon't worry if you mess up ( I know that's hard and I should follow my own advise)
Sometimes it turns out better...
I have 3 kids and I used to say after 8pm at night I was not such a good mother, because I really needed some time.
"pot and oral sex do not go together at all" very funny!!!
ReplyDeleteyou for sure need time to yourself- and it's ok to say you miss day care!!
Jennifer, of course you need time for yourself - how else can you function? And it is NOT selfish at all to miss day care. You have every right to that! I hope you'll go on liking your work and that every day you get some (or more) me-time. It's essential! That doesn't mean you don't love your kid. On the contrary!
ReplyDeleteGhurl pleez...you gotta take care of yourself so you can take care of Vinny! Feelings are never wrong. CDRT
ReplyDelete